It had been over six months since I had spoken to my aunts or my brother and his wife, whom I affectionately refer to as Satan. (I hope you see the sarcasm there).
I had ignored every attempt of theirs to try and get to me to, “come out of my face”, as my cousin Nikki would say. That’s what they were expecting from me because in the past year of my life, that’s how I reacted to the stupid bullshit from them. Little did they know though, I had taken on a new way of dealing with them and that was to go completely “no contact” and ignore them, but for the month and a half following my mom’s car being repossessed by the bank, the letters and the constant harassment of my Aunt Dana, I decided it was time to make a move.
As I mentioned a few posts back, I objected to my aunts being the executors of my mom’s will. The purpose of me doing that was to rattle their cages. The ultimate goal was to make things difficult enough that my aunts would just give up. Two months had passed since my objection was filed, and it was nearing the time of our first court date where all the involved parties were being deposed. I started to get nervous because my aunts were being very stubborn and seemed to have all intentions of fighting me, and carrying out their executive duties. I had ignored all the attempts to get me to back down, but since they decided to continuously harass my Aunt Dana with this stupid bullshit, I finally cracked. Trying to make my life miserable was one thing, but bullying her with this bullshit, it was completely fucked up.
I called my lawyer and asked if I could write to them. He told me yes, so long as I didn’t say or do anything illegal or threatening. I had no plan doing anything if the sorts and so I sat down and opened the notes app on my phone. It took me a bit, but I sat down and tried to write them a letter. I didn’t want the letter to sound confrontational in the least bit, but I wanted them to know I meant business, and that I wasn’t about to suck it up, back down or give in to their shit. Also, if they were going to dance with the devil (my brother’s wife) and my brother, then they should know who they’re dancing with, and how they’ve been lying, not only to me, but most likely to them and everyone else. I was sick of all the shit being talked about me and the lies they were spreading and so I finally decided to set the record straight. Just as my brother did, I sent it to the entire family only I used the CC option, because I wanted him to know that everyone was going to know what a liar he was, and so this is what I wrote. (In my original letter I included evidence in the form of texts and screen shots which aren’t shown here)
Debbie and Bea
I am writing this letter because I would like to clear up a few things that I have been hearing and seeing in the past few weeks. I also want to explain to you why I am objecting to my mom’s will and what I am trying to accomplish.
As far as my objection goes, as you can see in the court documents, my objection basically says that there is a conflict of interest as far as your representation goes. [my brother] used [his lawyer] when he improperly filed for Letters of Administration. You guys are also using him to file your petitions, and that’s a conflict of interest. None of this was ever discussed with me who by all intents and purposes, shares a 50% interest in the estate. I filed my mom’s will, based on two facts, one being because that is the PROPER thing to do when someone dies, testate. She had a will and [my brother] knew this prior to filing his affidavit that claimed he did diligent search for a will and determined none existed. As you can see from the court documents he was lying. Secondly, I filed the will because I wanted a document in the courts that stated that my mom’s wishes were to divide up her assets 50/50 between her two children. Who the executors were was completely irrelevant at that point in time. My mom and dad paid [family lawyer] to draft their wills for a reason, to protect me and my brother and their assets. Why would we want to pretend there was no will?
My personal objection to you two being executors, which doesn’t matter as much in legal sense, is that I tried to reach out to you a total of five times after I filed the will and neither of you responded. I haven’t spoken to either of you in a total of 6 months. Clearly you have continued communication with my brother. You are all using the same lawyer and he and his family are invited over for holidays, friends on Facebook, etc. with that said, I am supposed to think my opinion will matter when it comes to making decisions for the estate, when no one will speak to me, no matter how cordially I approach you? I’m sorry, but I am not taking that chance. Those are my mother’s things too. It’s bad enough her car was already repossessed after I was being told ALL of the bills were being paid. (See attached email from my brother). I have done extensive reading and research and have a full understanding of the estate process. Also, my lawyer has about 30+ years experience in these types of matters, and he has thoroughly explained to me the my options and the possible consequences and outcomes, again in which I fully understand. I may be wrong but it’s my personal belief that neither of you have even personally dealt with [their lawyer] and instead you are communicating with him by proxy. Had you been in contact with him then you’d probably know all of what I’m about to say.
I don’t know who informed you that I was looking to hire a public administrator but that is not what I am hoping for. What I am hoping for is to make things fair for BOTH people who have a shared interest in the estate, me and [my brother]
. I am not looking for anything more than my 50% share and to have some say in what happens to her belongings and property. That 50% gives me every right to know what’s going on. My lawyer has already explained this to [their lawyer] in phone calls, over the last two Fridays. Contrary to what you believe, the ball is entirely in your court at this point in time. It seems your lawyer hasn’t fully explained your options. If you both truly are concerned with my mother’s hard earned money and property, as you allege to be, and you don’t want to see her assets being squandered and wasted on lawyers, you both can very easily assure that doesn’t happen. You do have the option to resign as executors and that would help expedite the process, assuring no more assets are wasted. In that event, my attorney and [my brother’s] attorney would then amicably agree, and request that the courts appoint me and [my brother] as co-executors. If you want to do something that “really matters” for my mom, that would be your best option. [my brother] and I are grown adults. In 1996 when my mom and dad wrote their wills there was no way they could foresee the breakdown and deterioration of our relationships. If you’d like to hear what my mom’s real and more current last wishes were, you are more than welcome to contact the lawyer who came up to the hospital. He is granted to work pro-bono with cancer patients at [hospital’s name] hospital, his name is [hospital lawyer’s] and he can be reached at [phone number and name of law firm]. Her wishes as of November 10th, 2016 were to make [my brother] and I, co-executors, unfortunately she died before that could happen. Since me and [my brother] are grown adults and neither of you have any interest in her estate, and do not plan on being compensated for your service, then there should be no reason as to why you wouldn’t step aside and let him and I handle it. If you choose to pursue your roles as executors then it will be dragged out until next November, and there is no doubt about it. In an email sent to me a few weeks ago, [my brother] seemed very confident that I was going to lose my objection. Just know, if I was going to lose my objection and I had no chance, the judge easily could’ve denied my objection right then and there and appointed you as executors. If we don’t hear back from you in a timely manner then we are going to make a motion to have a temporary public administrator appointed so that the bills that have been piling up for the last four months, can finally be paid. He or she will be compensated for their service at a rate of 1-3% of the entire value of my mom’s estate. The decision is up to you. Just know that should you chose to fight my objection it is going to be very costly for all the involved parties.
Ps. As far as the bills go, they have NOT been being paid by my brother, that is yet another lie. After the car was repossessed, I started to look into everything. I cannot see the bills because the billing addresses have been changed. My mom’s car address has been being sent to [their lawyer’s address] . The rest are going to [my brother’s address] I was unaware of this until recently. Had I been able to see the statements, I would’ve made sure my mom’s car didn’t get repossessed. Since [their lawyer] was receiving the bills, he can be held liable. I do plan on checking with the Bar Association if that’s even ok for him to do. I spent three days making phone calls and requesting statements. As far as I can see the only bills that he had paid was possibly 2 months of the homeowners insurance. I paid the past due balance that was due in March 20th and the rest of the balance for the year so the house in insured until next March. The only other bill that was paid was the electric. No other bills have been paid. If [my brother] has been paying bills, why is every single bill in default? You can see the attached statements.”
My brother told my aunts that he and Satan had already laid out $12,000 and that’s why they could no longer keep up with the bills. I would love to see an accounting for that amount of money because they sure didn’t lay it out to pay bills of any sort for my mom’s estate. They are full of shit. I’m sure they paid some retainer fees for their attorney, as did I, but if they’re more than $3000, they got majorly ripped off! Anyway, that’s not my problem. I didn’t tell them to lie and say my mom didn’t have a will. They damn well knew she did and my brother told my husband he was going to file for letters of admin, whether I agreed to it or not. He can go fuck himself, if he thinks he will be getting any of that back! I am so utterly disappointed in the person my brother has become. The old him would NEVER do ANY of this.
After that letter was sent it was like dead silence. They all fell off the grid. Aunt Dana’s phone stopped ringing and there was nothing but crickets for miles. At the very least, I shut them up. A few days later, on a Friday afternoon, I got a phone call from my lawyer. He had spoken to their lawyer and was told that they were going to write up an agreement that my aunts were going to renounce their roles as executors. I won…