So we have finally made to present day! It’s now April of 2017. There’s been plenty of shit going down in the past few months but it’s been a lot more spread out, and so as I go along I will reflect on some of it and I’m going to start explaining what’s going on now and where things are between my brother, Satan, my Aunt Debbie and aunt Bea.
In the next few posts I want to basically give you my thoughts about everything that was going on in the last month of my mom’s life and how it correlates to what is going on now, because as everything was happening, I was very confused. As I have had time to reflect on it all, I’ve been able to gain perspective and a little bit of a better understanding as to why my brother and Satan were going so crazy and doing all this stupid bullshit. It’s mostly speculation but speculation that fits really will with what was happening and makes it make sense.
I should probably go back to March of 2016, after my mom had her surgery to remove the 8″ cancerous mass that was growing on her left kidney. Up until Early march of 2016, my brother and Satan were absolutely no help to my mom. They didn’t even really seemed very concerned about her condition, whatsoever. When my mom had her surgery back on February 10th, they only had come to the hospital one time that I can recall. It was the day that my mom had the surgery. My brother called me at 4:30 in the afternoon, after not hearing from him all day and the first thing he asks me is if she got a room because him and Satan want to send flowers. They may have come up one other time but that was it for her entire 7 day stay. Once she got home on February 17, they still did nothing. They didn’t come by or help her at all. For the next 6 weeks I was at her house daily. When she first got home from the hospital I had to go there every night to help get her in and out of bed. They never called or offered help. Then suddenly one day in late March, things changed. My aunt Sue had researched one of the best cancer hospitals in the US and suggested to me that my mom should sought out a second opinion. I agreed but I didn’t think my mom was ready for that yet. The second opinion was far away and since I was the one taking my mom for her weekly blood tests and doctors appointments, and seeing how she could hardly tolerate he short car rides we had, I thought it would be best if we waited a few more weeks until she got a little of her strength back.
I guess my family thought I wasn’t taking my mom’s illness seriously, but by this time I already knew that my mom had a rare and aggressive form of kindness cancer that had advanced to her lymphatic system and god knew where else. I knew it wasn’t good. I did a little reading about kidney cancer in transplant patients, who took immunosuppressive drugs and the outlook was grim at best. That wasn’t to say I didn’t think she needed to get a second opinion. I didn’t think one would hurt but I also didn’t think it was a big rush since her doctors had explained to me that even the most aggressive cancers have a growth rate of one centimeter per year.
They all seemed to think that it was crazy that my mom’s doctors told her to wait three months, after her surgery to go for follow up scans to see if the cancer had grown. They need to allow some time to pass to figure out how fast it was growing. Three months is actually too soon according to some doctors that I have spoke with. The standard is 6 months. Anyway, my mom’s cousin, Lenore’s daughter, worked at the other hospital that my aunt Sue had researched, and so when Aunt Bea caught wind of the situation and reached out to her to answer some questions. When she shared the email back, she CC’d me, Aunt Debbie and Aunt Sue but she sent my brother his own private email. I had not informed my brother about the second opinion for two reasons. One being that I didn’t think my mom was ready, and two being that he didn’t not seem to want to take an active role in helping my mom and/or caring for her. I had been trying to communicate with him prior to my mom’s surgery but every time I’d reach out to him, he wouldn’t answer and instead he’d either call my mom or Aunt Debbie to find out what was going on.
I do know that during that very same time the email was sent to my brother, a phone call between my aunt Bea and Satan happened. It seemed like the second after that phone call happened, my brother and Satan suddenly wanted to not only take a more active role in my mom’s care, but they wanted to lead the way. My brother completely took the reins on the second opinion stuff and I was totally fine with it however I couldn’t help but feel like something was said to them to light the fire under their asses. I had been trying to convey to my brother how serious my mom’s situation was and until then, he didn’t seem to care. My brother is the type of person, and I hate to say this, but he only does things for other people when there is a benefit in it for him. In this case I strongly believe that Aunt Bea informed Satan and my brother that my mom was either looking to take him off her will as executor and/or take him off altogether.
For years my mom was under the impression that her will had my brother listed as the executor. Till this day, I’m not really sure why she thought that. I am not kidding when I say that every single person she talked to (friends, family, etc.) she told them that she needed to change her will to take my brother off as executor and put me on. When I informed her that my Aunt Bea and Aunt Debbie were on the will as executors and all other paperwork,(healthcare proxy, power of attorney) she just said, “oh.”. I actually happen to have me telling her that on a recording because I told her about it after our meeting with the palliative care team when she was in the hospital. I started to record all of our meetings with doctors and such about a month or so before she died because there was a lot of information, to remember. I told her about the will right after the meeting because power of attorney and wills came up during that meeting (because my brother of course brought it up) After I informed her of who was on her will, I didn’t press the issue any further because she was having a really rough day in the hospital and so I never found out why she had thought my brother was the executor. The only thing I could think of is that she maybe, since the will was written in 1996 when my brother and I were still minors, had it written where if my brother was still a minor, it would be my aunts, but if he wasn’t, it would be him. I believe had she had another will it would’ve been in the safe with the old ones and really, she probably would’ve thrown the old ones out. If there is indeed another will somewhere, I have no idea where it is. My mom used to keep the combination to our safe in a book. Behind that book, I found a handwritten note from my mom that told us her will was in the safe.
With that said, I found out months later, after her death, that when aunt Debbie was telling people that I destroyed my mom’s will, she was talking about the imaginary will that named my brother as executor. I was totally confused as to why she was saying I destroyed my mom’s will and so I sent her a photo of the copy I had to prove to her I had the copy. At that time I had believed that she was talking about the 1996 will because my brother and Satan accused me of stealing the original copy of it. I also later found out that Satan was the one who started the rumor about the other will. Funny because my brother discussed the will several times with my husband and never once did he make any mention of any other will that named him as executor. That’s because he knew if he did my husband would call his bluff and tell him he’s a fucking liar.
I am completely insulted that anyone in my family would believe I’d do such a thing. I thought my family knew I had integrity and they knew what type of person I was. Besides I don’t see how me ripping up a will that names him and using a will that names two other people I dislike is going to help me! I’ll be the first to admit that I really don’t understand why my brother feels so god damned entitled that he should be executor just because why? Because he is older? I personally feel like he lost that privilege when he dumped my mom off the minute she didn’t comply with his wife’s ridiculous wedding demands. For nearly three years he dismissed her feelings, fought with her, and let his wife talk to her like she was a heap of dog shit on the sidewalk. He didn’t go to her house for an entire two years except for maybe one or two brief visits to pick up a piece of mail that was sent to her accidentally and his comic books. That’s it. Then when she got sick, he did nothing for months and only decided to jump in when his wife finally decided that my mom was an investment for her. So yes I don’t feel like my brother deserves to be in charge of my mom’s possessions. At the end of the day though, those are MY feelings. Had my mom chose him, I would’ve just had to deal with it and that’s it. He is part owner of everything she left us. My mom loved him unconditionally which is the same way I will love my son.
After I submitted my mom’s will I never heard back from my aunts. I reached out several times and got nothing. I offered to have a peaceful conversation with them but they refused to speak with me and so I was left with no choice but to consult with my lawyer and see what my options were. It was CLEAR that they weren’t going to treat me fairly. That I was going to be left in the dark regarding my mom’s estate because they too have been sucked into Satan’s web. My attorney filed the will on December 13, 2017. It took my aunts all the way until February 10th to file their petitions. My lawyers filed my objection to the will shortly after that. I was objecting to my aunt’s being the executors. Shortly before my mom died she had a lawyer come up to the hospital and she told the lawyer she wanted to name both me and my brother as executors. As I know, that was her dying wish and so I entered an objection to my aunts being executors. My brother and I are grown adults now. We do not need them.
My aunts are still going on about the “other will”. There is no “other will” and if there was, they’ve made absolutely no attempt to find it. Just as my lawyer did, their lawyer should’ve informed them that the lawyer should have a copy of the will. Aunt Debbie used the lawyer who drafted my mom’s will and handled her malpractice law suit with her doctor, to do her first divorce. Her and my mom discussed everything because they spoke every single day since my dad died in 2006. They even discussed their wills and I know this for a fact because aunt Debbie told me. She knows for damn sure. She’s a fucking liar; going along with this shit. There never was another will.
Recently I’ve been informed that my mom alledegdly had a new will written right before she bought her most recent car. That is according to aunt Debbie. I do not believe that; AT ALL. I loved my mom, but she was very cheap when it came to certain things. For three years she talked about having her will changed but she never did it because it was going to cost her a couple hundred dollars and so I find it really hard to believe that for no reason whatsoever, my mom just decided out of the clear blue sky to have her will written three years ago which would’ve been on or around the time my brother started dating Satan. If any time I’d believe she’d do it, it would’ve been right after my dad died in 2006. I don’t see my. Ok randomly wanting to spend a couple of hundred dollars just to get a will written.
The sick part is, I think some of my family actually believes this bullshit. There is absolutely NO WAY, I can prove it isn’t true. My aunt Sue suggested that I go through banks statements from that time and see if there are any checks or transactions with a lawyer. That still wouldn’t prove shit. Me finding a transaction wouldn’t prove them right. That wouldn’t prove that I destroyed the will. For all I know my mom herself could’ve destroyed it. Maybe that was her way of getting my brother off the will. I’d still question why she’d keep the old ones if there was a new one written.
I did go through her bank statements for that time period and I didn’t find any checks or transactions for a lawyer. That doesn’t mean they didn’t happen. She could’ve paid with a credit card or in cash. I don’t know. I don’t know why I’m even bothering or worrying about it. I know she didn’t have it re-written for the sheer fact that she would’ve told me she did.
If my aunts and my brother really believe there was another will, why aren’t they actively looking for it? Why did my brother file for administration at the very beginning? Why doesn’t my aunt Debbie know who wrote it? Why hasn’t my brother ever said anything to me or my husband about it? I actually gave both her and my brother the phone number to the woman who sent me the will. Since they’re still all about this other will, I assume they never called her or reached out to her in anyway. Why? Because they know there never was another will.